Lisa and Greg, sitting in a tree
by pretentious-emo-kid
Summary: It's complete, guys! Never fear though. As you will see inside, I have made a promise that should ease the pain. R&R as always, pleeease.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer - I don't own anyone from the show, or to do with said show. **

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**Lisa and House,**

**Sitting in a tree.**

It was apt, Cuddy thought, the song dancing around her head. She was not entirely sure where it had come from. She suspected it might have something to do with the abnormal amount of young children thrust at her today in clinic by worried parents. It was always like this around winter time. A child gets a cold, and the parents are convinced it's dying of God-knows-what disease that they found when they googled their beloved offspring's symptoms. Though, if she had a child of her own, of course, she was fully aware that she would be exactly the same.

Anyway, wherever it had come from, whatever had prompted it, Cuddy had walked to her office humming the childish tune that dominates every six-year-old's nightmares. It was apt, because she and House had such a childish relationship. Mainly because he was such a child. Albeit, a warped, disturbing, grouchy one.

**K-I-S-S-I-N-G**

That wasn't so apt. In fact, Lisa Cuddy was almost ashamed to admit to _herself _how long it had been since she had been kissing anyone. Or, at least, anyone she really gave a crap about.

**First comes love…**

Cuddy was an honest woman by principle, but sometimes, her job meant that it was not always wise to practise those principles. In fact, for such an honest woman, she had become very skilled at twisting the truth, and lately, some at the skill had crept into the rest of her life. Especially when she was sat behind her desk, mere feet away from the lazy grin of Gregory House. She pretended she didn't sometimes want to vault over any furniture between them.

**Then comes marriage…**

Well, that was laughable.

**Then comes Lisa pushing a baby's carriage.**

For a moment, the thought of cradling a baby in her arms almost brought tears to Cuddy's eyes. Watching it fall asleep in its cradle, seeing it roll around on a play mat, standing close with outstretched arms when it took its first shaky steps as a toddler. The image was so real, she could almost touch it.

But she was at work, and it was neither the time nor the place to be wishing for motherhood.

So she imagined House as a father, and laughed loudly to the empty office until she felt better.

HMD HMD HMD

**Cuddy and House,**

**Sitting in a tree.**

Bit of a dumb place to be sat, House thought. Not nearly sturdy enough.

He had been stood waiting for an elevator when he had a young boy walk past behind him, humming a tune that House remembered vaguely from his childhood. He could only remember one version, however.

**Doing what they shouldn't be.**

They shouldn't, that was true, but then again, House had never been one for rules and regulations. Shame Cuddy was. Somehow, he didn't think she'd risk losing both their jobs for a meaningless fling.

**Begins in 'S'**

Maybe he should ask. He'd misjudged people before. It didn't happen often, but sometimes Greg House was wrong. She'd flouted the rules before, after all. It wouldn't hurt to ask.

**Ends in 'X'**

He was a persuasive man. It could backfire on him, but he doubted it. He doubted that if he cornered her against the wall in her office, pressing their faces close, and whispering in her ear, either of them would be able to fight long against the chemistry that had so long dominated their relationship.

**Oh my God, it must be…sex!**

And it really would be _so _good.

HMD HMD HMD

**Lisa and Greg,**

**Sitting in a tree.**

**Clearly it is meant to be!**

But then again, perhaps neither felt the same way…

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Reviews pleeeeeeeeeeease. 


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer - As per usual. I own no one.

Okay, reviewers, I love you lot! Thank you so much. Your reviews made me happy :)

This chapter wouldn't really go right, promise the next will be better.

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Happy birthday to me…**

Another year. Another 365 days. Another – well, Cuddy's mood proved that she simply couldn't spare the time to work out how many hours, minutes and seconds it was.

**Happy birthday to m****e…**

Yep, it was that time again. She had spent all day saying 'thank you' for gifts she didn't want. Gifts that were completely pointless and impersonal. Gifts that said all the wrong things. In fact, one person had brought her a mug. A mug?! Mugs said one thing, and one thing only. They said, 'here, we reckoned you were too old to be drinking anything except tea now'. Cuddy had plenty of wine glasses at home, but that particular day, she would have been so happy to see one. Even an ugly, chipped one would have earned the giver genuine gratitude.

**Happy birthday ****dear Lisa…**

What had she achieved since her last birthday?

Professionally, she was doing great. The hospital was running smoothly enough, even with House starting pointless legal battles every other day. She was respected and admired on the whole. A few of the staff would even go as far as to say that they liked her, but none of it really meant anything.

Personally, well, that aspect of her life was near non-existent. The 'search for sperm' as she had heard House refer to it wasn't going great, and her love life was feeling like a far off dream. In between work, and fancying the cane off a certain employee, she had little time for dating.

**Happy birthday to me.**

Images of life as an old spinster flashed by her eyes. She would be alone; her only company would be her regrets.

Happy, indeed. Cuddy hated birthdays.

HMD HMD HMD

**Happy birthday to you…**

House thought that Cuddy looked pretty good for her age. Or at least, that was what he thought privately. Publicly, he was happy to tell anyone who cared to listen that she looked as though she was 'getting on a bit'. He had a reputation to keep up, after all.

**You're a hundred and two****…**

It was funny how she still seemed to look so young and hot to him, when it felt as though he had known her so long. He struggled to remember, or care about, a time when he had not argued with or tormented her. He felt as though she had become a part of his life that could not be removed. Without his quest to turn her hair white, he simply wasn't House.

**You look like a monkey…**

House had seen monkeys. In the zoo, on TV. They didn't have the same effect on him as Lisa Cuddy. Thankfully.

**And you smell like one too…**

Being immature was great. No responsibilities, no worrying, and the look on someone's face whenever he came out with a remark worthy of a six-year-old was priceless.

Why was Cuddy so keen on him growing up?

HMD HMD HMD

**Lisa and House,**

**Sitting in a tree.**

**Clearly it is meant to be!**

Sometimes it's time to get a grip and change your life.

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Every time you don't take the time to review, a PEK loses her wings. x 


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer - I own nothing. As you are all _fully _aware by now.

I'm staying round a friend's tomorrow evening, so no new chapter after this until saturday evening (GMT). However, as you are all such _lovely_ reviewers (really, I have never had reviewers quite as nice), I felt guilty, so this chapter is extra early, and extra nice.

This chapter is a little different to the others. Key: _House's thoughts, _Cuddy's thoughts.

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****Roses are red…**

_Red__ like those shoes. She only wears them about once a month. Usually on days she's feeling bad, or she's got something tough to face. They are the most expensive shoes she owns, and they are also the highest. Sometimes she wears them because they make her feel sexy. Other times she wears them because she knows them make her look sophisticated. Lately, she's been wearing them more often. I know why. She likes to feel almost as tall as me. It makes the arguments more bearable._

Red. I have to work hard not to turn that colour whenever I'm around him. Sometimes it's because I'm angry. Sometimes it's because he can make me feel so embarrassed - like I'm about three inches tall. Other times it's because he makes my heart race, and the butterflies in my stomach make me feel like a teenager again. God, that's pathetic.

**Violets are blue…**

_Blue's the colour my face would be shortly after trying anything with her. She'd kill me. Strangle me until I told her I was joking._

It's the colour that represents sadness, isn't it? That's what they say. 'I'm feeling blue'. That's how I feel at the moment. Sexually charged banter is great, but though you never expect it to happen, you grow up. Suddenly, certain things look more desirable. Things like…clothes that are made to be practical, not fashionable, a cup of tea on the sofa, as opposed to a night out, _marriage_. Well, maybe not marriage. Not with the person I have in mind, but at least some kind of relationship.

**Sugar is sweet…**

_But, then again, maybe not. Maybe I should say something. After all, when House is bad, he's very, very bad, but when he's nice, women fall at his feet._

Ah, what's the worst that could happen? I need to do something. I'm not going to have yet another birthday where I sit and wonder where my life has gone. I'm fed up of regrets, and waiting. I need to do _something_!

**And so are you!**

_I think…_

I love you.

HMD HMD HMD

**Lisa and House,**

**Sitting in a tree.**

**Clearly it is meant to be.**

And so, realisation dawns.

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As if I even have to ask any more :) 


	4. Chapter 4

Better late than never, I suppose. :)**

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**I see London…**

Cuddy had never been to London.

It was one of the rather random thoughts that were circling her head that particular morning. Well, she presumed it was morning. It was still dark, but she was certain that she had not dropped of until about one a.m. at the earliest.

She would like to see London one day, but she didn't like the thought of going alone.

**I see France…**

She had been to Paris alone once. She certainly wasn't repeating that experience. The 'city of love' was not a place you wanted to be without some one to share it with. The whole time she had felt as though everyone was staring at her, pitying her for being alone. It was a shame, really. It had ruined what should have been a lovely trip. Something told her, though, that Paris would be even more beautiful with some one to share it with.

**I see House's underpants!**

She must have seen his underpants at one point. She couldn't remember, but then again, clothes had come off in such a hurry that it was no wonder.

Maybe House would go with her to Paris.

She could imagine it now.

He'd argue against it…loudly.

He'd moan…loudly.

He'd make embarrassing racially stereotypical jokes about the French…very loudly.

Maybe she'd just avoid Paris altogether.

HMD HMD HMD

**Teacher, teacher…**

House was having one of those 'naked at school' dreams. It was strange. He had never in his life had such dreams. Well, not embarrassing ones. He didn't count the ones that involved his attractive English teacher.

He jerked awake from the dream, and realised that he was still naked. He wasn't embarrassed though. This was more like one of the English teacher dreams.

He didn't roll over. He could hear from Cuddy's breathing that she was awake, and he didn't want to talk to her yet.

**I declare…**

Declaration had been something of a theme in his life that night. First Cuddy had declared that she had feeling for him, and then he had declared that she was really quite hot… though not in those words.

It felt good to have it all out in the open, to have cleared the air.

Sleeping with her hadn't felt too bad, either.

**I see Cuddy's bottom bare!**

He decided that it was time to roll over and talk to Cuddy.

He couldn't have wished to be greeted by a better view.

HMD HMD HMD

**Lisa and Greg,**

**Sitting in a tree.**

**Clearly it is meant to be!**

Admitting your true feelings can have embarrassing and unwanted side effects, but, just occasionally; it can be just what you needed.

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Reviews prevent writer's block, among other nasty conditions. :) 


	5. Chapter 5

Okey kokey, this is the last chapter, and sorry to people to hate really long author's notes, as I have a few things I feel must be said.

Firstly, thank you to everyone who reviewed me. You were all so nice! As a present to you all, I'm planning to write a shamelessly Huddy one shot next. Should be posted in the next few weeks.

Next, (sorry to plug my own work, I don't do it too often, I hope) I have written a scene called 'motivation'. I'm actually working on a whole script, and I posted 'motivation' as a taster to see what people think. Unfortunately, I've only had the one review, and so I'm still not sure. I would be so grateful if you would take the time to R&R it. It's short and Huddy!

Lastly, this chapter is longer than most, as I have added a bit of normal story to the end. Thought it needed it.

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Lisa and Greg,**

**Sitting in a tree…**

Lisa smiled at her reflection in the mirror. She was happy. It was six o'clock in the morning, she had had barely any sleep, there was a snoring heap in her bed, and she was completely happy. Well, as completely as she could expect to be. House was still a snarky, commitment phobic bastard, who seemed determined to follow a path of self-destruction and lose both of their jobs on the way, but ignoring all of that, she was feeling very content.

There was only one problem and that was that once again, she couldn't get that stupid song out of her head, but even that wasn't bothering her too much. Anyway, she had heard House humming the same song at several points this week, and his version had wormed its stubborn way into her mind.

**Doing what they shouldn't be…**

She wasn't going to think about that. Technically she probably _shouldn't _be doing it, but there was no specific rules saying that they _mustn't_.

**Begins with 'S'…**

It's not like anyone would guess, anyway. She and House were hardly going to act very differently around each other at work. She would be disappointed if they did.

**Ends with 'X'…**

She heard a sigh from House and smiled again. She wasn't going to worry about that now. Instead, she was going to walk to work with a spring in her step, and a stupid grin stretched across her face when she though no one was looking.

Oh my God, it must be sex! 

It was going to be a good day.

HMD HMD HMD

**Cuddy and House,**

**Sitting in a tree…**

House awoke to hear Cuddy humming in the bathroom. It was that song again; that damn tree song. He stretched lazily in her sheets and let the sound wash over him. He had a day off today - that meant that he should probably go home, and lie about at his own house, but with Cuddy at work, he was hardly going to pass up the chance to snoop around her house all day. Cuddy's humming stopped as she left the bathroom and made her way to the front door.

**K-I-S-S-I-N-G…**

Speaking of, he really should go kiss her goodbye and tell her to have a good day or something, but that wasn't really…him. It was probably best that she understood that now, if this was going to be a regular occurrence.

**First comes love…**

That wasn't to say that he didn't care or that he had any regrets. Contrary to losing anything from admitting his feelings and sleeping with her, he had simply become even more drawn to the idea of 'them'.

**Then comes marriage…**

He heard her unlock her front door, and then pause. Silently, he counted down in his head. 5…4…3…2…1… "I'll see you later then, House…?"

There was a hint of a question to her voice. House was glad – she was not hoping for too much. He didn't want to disappoint her. Cuddy was one of those women who should have 'for keeps' stamped on her forehead.

He waited until she was almost out of the door before calling, "Yeah."

As though it was happening in front of him, he saw her smile slightly and leave the house.

**Then comes Lisa pushing a baby's carriage!**

House flopped heavily back onto the pillows. For a moment, the panic of 'what have I gotten myself into?!' descended onto him, but it passed fairly swiftly. Take it one day at a time.

And, for God's sake, _don't _think about babies.

HMD HMD HMD

**Lisa and Greg,**

**Sitting in a tree.**

**Clearly it is meant to be!**

Cuddy unlocked her front door. It had been a _long_ day, and she was tired, but she was still smiling. The best bit of the day had definitely been her conversation with Wilson. He had come to her office to discuss his latest worry about House. Apparently, House had been showing an interest in other people's love lives that was bordering on unhealthy. Wilson was wondering if Cuddy knew anyone mad/stupid enough for them to somehow set her up with House, and take his mind off everyone else's business.

Cuddy had very solemnly nodded, adding sighs and tuts in appropriate places, whilst desperately trying not to laugh. She had managed to discourage Wilson from the idea, claiming that House would see easily through any ploy that they tried. Even now, the memory made her laugh.

She hung her bag up and threw herself onto the sofa. She was just trying to decide whether or not to call House, when she realised that there was some one else in her home. She could smell food.

She nervously followed the smell to the kitchen.

House was leant against her worktop, eating what was definitely the pasta salad she had been saving for tomorrow's lunch.

HMD HMD HMD

House looked up from his food. Cuddy seemed relieved that he wasn't a murderer or a burglar.

"House, have you been home yet?"

He shook his head. "Why would I? You have such a pretty house. And besides, I can make all the mess I want here, with minimum repercussions."

Cuddy snatched the salad away.

"I'm sure that you've done plenty of snooping, so there's no way that you didn't find the takeaway menus. Would it have killed you to pick up the phone and order something?"

"No, but the cholesterol in that crap would have."

"House, you eat nothing _but_ crap."

House smirked. She was the hottest person in the world, his banter partner, and now his girlfriend. Life was good.

**Lisa and Greg,**

**Sitting in a tree.**

**Clearly it was meant to be.**


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